one of the most happening event in aj.
aj idol 2006.



oh and just when i thought things were calm. haha.

it's not gg to be easy after all. i thought it would be.


i guess half the house will be destroyed before he leaves.
it's the clearing up that sucks. especially after a hard days work.


sigh. no one will really understand.

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 11:31:00 pm:.
...
something's changed. i can feel it.








rain rain go away
come back in another months time PUh-LEase. for the sake of everyone.




jealousy.


jealousy arouses when you love someone too much.



love the poeple who love you...not the people whom u love, coz they might never love you back.


im being so random.



tmr's sports day.

this is the first season that games have been postponed so many times in my 8 years of netball.




it's funny as hectic things are at knc. its quite calm here at home. considering the stuff that's happening. calm.

yet.


im sick of hiding my stuff..

im sick of looking at mama hide the kitchen stuff.seriously. i cant wait for it to be over. but someitmes when i think of it, i feel so sad for her.. so so so sad..

suddenly, i wanna change my values. get married no more. i dont noe. im a confused girls now.

confused and jealous.


yet, im still trying to look on all the bright side.
you lose some you gain some.
realli. maybe something nice was that my dearestest liana msg me today! yeayness. and wished me good luck for my match.
and also, i shall be happy for firdaus's band for getting into finals of AJ idol which im gg on Firday and scream my lungs out for them. muahaha.



there's a change in the direction of the wind.

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 7:50:00 pm:.
...
oh.

and i have to thank zaw and fizah. so much. for being there for me last monday when i needed a much needed hug. =) =)
maybe i try to hard. to take care of others.that someitmes i lose myself in the process and really in the end, i feel like all that inflicted some hurt upon myself. but all i want is for the best for them all. to come back strong, to not fall sick. because the conseuences long term is dire. and these are the little things i think about that i think matters. but like what i said, this is just my own opinion. does not represent everyones. thats what makes us different.i just want you to know, that i just care for you all lah. just wish you would look at that side of the story.
it's tough lah. but we'll survive. we'll all survive in the end. no matter how much tears it takes.

but as much tears, it also brings that much, or even nmore laughter and joy.

thank you again fizah and zaw. haha. east ppl. lol.






sometims i wonder why ppl choose to live that way. why.why.why. destroy your own life, affecting those around you. those who loved you once. whom i regret to say that dont love you anymore. i feel like shaking you as though waking you up from this nightmare. waking all of us up from this nightmare. and live in the fantasy it once was. where there was still a security officer. WAS. now, it's like a policeman. how ironic. ahh. just realised that. super ironic. paradox.whatever you call it.

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 8:57:00 pm:.

family day today!

and it really felt like family day. haha. had an enjoyable time. much more enjoyable than last year, to me la. but of course, can never forget the selling of coconuts. and this year, otak-otak, satay, fishballs and milo "dinasour". haha. but i think it was a great day. are like ice kachang, fried ice-cream, otal-otak,satay, nachos with cheese, birthday cake and some more which i cant rem right now. and then, when i went home, ate two plates of mee goreng. oops. gotta play harder during pj game to lose that extra weight.muahaha.

but, that will be the second and last time i'll be entering a haunted house. hah. serious. and i shall make a big apology to jow zhiyen here for destroying her trip to the haunted house when i keep grabbing her and hiding behind her. haha. and i guessed im the cause of mel not being scared too coz everytime i screamed yilun would scream and mel would be like "oh, ghost. ok" hahaha. sorry ppl! but i originally did not want to go in! because of my stupid but turned out to be ok idea, i ahd to go in. so sonia was given a team birthday present b y the last "ghost" in the haunteed house. muahahha. i still cant imagine. she didnt wanna take it. haha. a nike bag! lol.
happy birthday sonia!

and then mended the stall for a while.sold a few otahs and satays. and then, visited ml booth. then walked around. walked and walked. rocked to the bands. haha. *prays firdaus/desley/matthew and the singer.(oops wats his name) haha. gets into finals of AJ IDOL. then i'll be there on friday. haha. okie. i love the singer's voice. haha. serious. especially when he sang the bdae song for hwee miang on the stage. haha. HAPPY BIRTHDAY HWEE MIANG. haha. then walked some more. sold some more. cleared up. and then, nothing could have ended a perfect day by spending the short time with the netballers shooting. and zhiyen shot like 300 shots? more than the normal shooter. lol. and yanting disappeared.orhhhh. and yeah before that these people embarassed themselves in the hall by running around with the long sponge thingey they used for the gladiator game. and went hitting each other. poor yong yong and me. innocently sitting down and kena whack. haha. at least yong yong had a stick which made them run so fast around the hall and the booth, faster than i've ever seen them run before.lol. esp sonia. hahaha. after taking lotsa pics and zhiyen was satisfied with shooting. (give it up zhiyen. muahaha. oops. not this season k, cannot play GA.haha) then went home. and bathed and napped. =) energised.



today's one of the better days in this week. wasnt really a very good week for me. dont noe but the last few trainings were especially mentally tiring. but yeah. learnt quite a lot. ah. and then i rem one of my goal for this year. to accept that i cant please everyone. and there i was trying to please everyone again. next time just go witht he majority! seriously. it takes a lot of process to accomdate to everyone. some things, you just cant. and really different people have different opinions, as i have surveyed. and i feel ok now, that someitmes, when people give feedback its their own opinion. it doesnt automatically represent everyone's opinion. so dont be swayed and dont be affected. self-reminder.

next week's another hectic week. mon game, tues tuition, wed game, thurs sports day, friday aj idol finals, sat training, sun tuition. that's another mentally physically tiring week. haha. but im glad for the poeple around me who somehow will make me live through each day with a smile. poeple literally near around me, and also those in the East basically. =)

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 8:19:00 pm:.
...
i can hardly believe that tomorrow will be the last official saturday training before season. it's like it was just yest or smth that zhiyen was still declaring sat trainings over after every sat training which are the killer. the track. gulps.

man.


haha.


when it's over then u appreciate it?
hmm, i dont noe.


but it's really gonna be the end of netball for me. competitive netball at least. i dont noe why i entered it in the first place. really, i do love netball, just no competitive one. it takes the fun away from netball. in competitive netball, all you feel is pressure pressure pressure and the desire to win. there's not much of enjoyment left even though u try so hard to enjoy the game. but to me, fun and competitive just dont go though some people might disagre with this.
but nonetheless, since i am already in the final year of competitive netball, might as well bring out the best of it right. =)


i want it to end yet i dont want it to end. what a fickle minded person i am. i wonder if the rest of them feel the same way.

ahh, and im so proud of myself for doing homeowrk today. when i could have been watching the movies my brother bought! woohoo! so tmr i can train in peace. and sunday i can go out with taufik and hidayah! and martin came over my house for a while today. that was my breaktimE! i miss him already. =( love him to bits. sooo cuteeee baby with that baby talk and the "nonono"..geraMM!!! ahhhhh....

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 10:10:00 pm:.
...
i have to blog about this.

mystery.


and thank you to MARK LAM KAHO for helping me "find" my lost shoebag. though it wasnt much effort, (hehe) BUT it he's just a lucky guy. mystery, mystery.

oh well let me start from the beginning.
one fine wed(yest),
i was rushing out of the house. when i reached bishan mrt, i sat down while waiting for the train. and i put my bag and my shoe bag beside me. and, i took out my tie and started wearing it. and SUDDENLY the train came. and so i rushed and i cant recall whether i took my shoebag with me. (i guess i did since it was found at the pe dept)
ok so when i reached skl after assembly first period was pe. and me and my clique put our bags outside audi. (which is relatively far from the pe dept) so after pe, we came back to our bags.had four periods break, then when i went off for Malay lesson, i totally forgot that i had a shoebag that day. but i checked with kanyu and selina and they said that when they left the audi area they didnt see any shoebag as well.
oh well, so the day passed normally until 1.45 pm. yes 1.45 PM. then i realised i wasnt holding my shoebag!! and i panicked and panicked. and i recalled my steps all the way to the mrt. but i remembered that while walking in skl i saw a reflection of myself carrying a shoebag. so i was 70% sure it was lost in skl. go GO, dun have, council room, they said they stopped the lost and found, searched malay classroom, audi, pe dept. no sign of any shoebag. i was so close to tears really. coz that would have marked the 4th thing i've lost in aj. (and SOME of them are really not due to me being careless!! im just so unlucky) and so i went for training with Na BIng's shoes. thankx NA BING!!!! and also, thank you to sonia and jiamein and yilun for suggesting to fork out 6 bucks thereabouts to buy me a new shoe. as a reward as capt. lol. i declined really but the thought was so sweeeeet. i was so touched. haha. really, thank you so much. it lifted my mood a bit. though realli i didnt want it from the team coz if i need to buy the shoes, since i lost it, i'd fork it out from my tuition money. yeah, but i was so touched. haha.

and so anyway, today when i was having tuition, mark called me. and he said smth like can u run 4X100m. i said no.haha. that poor housecapt have been bugging me to run. but i dont want ah. i vowed not to take part in any event in track and field. the feeling of competition from netball is enough to handle.haha. dont even wanna run for fun. plus, i dont want coach mad. but this persistent guy said, "will you run 4X100m is your addidas shoes" and i was like.......
he found my SHOESSS!!! at the boys shelves outside pe dept!!! i couldnt believe it. i had to ask him again and again. it's such a mystery how it ended up there. it's either non mihi solum, some kind soul decided to put there for i dont noe what reason coz if you were to find smth, you would just leave it where it is right? why switch its position? OR, some evil person playing a prank. or [rolly i have an enemy? which i doubt la. really. im a neutral person usually. haha.

oh well, thankx again mark! =) and so, yes now, i have to run 4X100m. since he helped me right, help him lahhh...


=)
=)
=)

and im glad i did one thing today. i was feeling so frustrated. i took a piece of scrap paper during hist break today and wrote down everything i was unhappy about. oh and that includes a 3 and a half mark out of 21 mark for maths test today.haha.
and then i wrote all the things i should be happy about. and then i felt better! because really, when i look at the things i should be happy about, like sonia and jiamein and yilun's sweet thought. i was happy. and it paid off. i am really happy now coz my shoebag, and more importantly, my addidas training shoes have been found. oh, and my green socks if i must add.haha. yeay.

but still,

my other stuff that went missing remains a mystery.
my pencil case that is not brancded at all.
my mp3 that was like not very branded like creative or smth.
my key holder was definitely stolen. coz i only found my keys without the holder.

maybe one day these things will appear too. i really miss that white mp3.
















taufik and hidayah. it's more of helping now. especially that the bursary is in. i just wanna help.

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 10:20:00 pm:.
...
i'm in love again.


with another lifehouse song.



blind.


I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as he turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
Only in hopes of dreaming
That everything would be like is was before
But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

After all this time
Would you ever wanna leave it
Maybe you could not believe it
That my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you will ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
And I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me dies when I let you go

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 10:14:00 pm:.
...
ok ok..
haha..
this is not due to the many requests,

but i really do love netballers too.

netball.a great team game.

that just requires support from each other.

and that's where the trust and friendship comes in too.


it's more than just a game. =)


I LOVE AJC NETBALLERS!!! countdown 5 more trainings!

.:enamored_hunn was pricked and bled at 11:04:00 pm:.
...